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“Part of growing up is discarding the personas that aren’t contributing to our happiness and success in life”- @GayHendricks #mentalhealth #happiness #reinvention #anxiety #depression

Posted by on Apr 8, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

I love this Gay Hendricks quote, because it challenges our limiting beliefs that come from the past.  Maybe you tell someone you are “a shy person,” “the overbearing mom,” “the worrier,” “the boss,” or the “advice giver” and deep down you don’t want to be these definitions. Often, we let experiences from our past define who we are today.  You can be the person you want to be and can start letting others know you are not the person you define yourself as anymore!  So, for example, if you are typically the “advice giver” and your friend asks for advice, turn it back to her this time…”what do you think about this?” This lets her know you aren’t going to churn out an answer and gets her to start thinking for herself…a win win!

With past definitions comes a certain pressure to perform, often stresses us out and leaves us feeling defeated from becoming the person we want to be.  Start small this week and pick an area of your life you want to change…”act” like the person you want to be in situations where you define yourself otherwise and watch those definitions slowly fade and stay in the past where they belong!

“If you run from your fears, they will follow you. If you run straight at your fears, they will get the hell out of your way. Fears hate it when you do that”- @JenSincero #fears #goals #mindset #mentalhealth #anxiety

Posted by on Apr 1, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

It’s the start of a new month and this month’s got a theme!  The theme is….da don doonnnn: Conquering our limiting beliefs!

The Blogspiration quote this week by Jen Sincero is to challenge and motivate you to conquer your fears.  Maybe you have a fear of asking for a raise or giving that cute guy you keep seeing your number.  Whatever it is, I am giving you the challenge to tell those fears to take a hike, get a little uncomfortable and ultimately make things happen!  Even if there isn’t a positive outcome, find the positive in getting out of your comfort zone, conquering a fear and actually doing it because that’s what matters here, not the result.  Hopefully you feel a positive surge of energy facing a fear head-on this week, you can do it and you are awesome for trying!

In a gentle way, you can shake the world-Mahatma Gandhi #gandhi #change #kindness #hope #mentalhealth #helpothers #volunteer

Posted by on Mar 25, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

Do you know why I like to shop for my daughter at the Disney store?…because consistently every time I shop there they tell me to “have a magical day!” It literally shakes my world because the next store associate may not speak to me at all or I may get a disgruntled grunt.  It baffles me that my world is shaken by people who are nice! That’s just not the norm these days.  When people are nice to me, it motivates me to be nice back and continue the gesture.  Let’s shake the world together this week (and maybe everyday after that)!

This week, extend a gentle gesture to shake someone else’s world.  Remember we are all people, all have our own issues and could all use a nice moment in our lives. Bring a coworker coffee, say hello to your jerky neighbor, give up a subway seat to someone else…whatever it is, know that you are sending out kindness and positive energy through not just that moment, but to the world.  It’s contagious as long as we keep it going…

“Be open to possibilities and plan for opportunities”-Laura Vanderkam #possibilities #opportunities #selfcare #dreams #mentalhealth #anxiety #preparation

Posted by on Mar 18, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

We often expect the worst when we have the opportunity to plan for the best.  For example, when I am speaking at conferences I carry business cards with me in case people are interested in working with one of our counselors.  I always hang around after I speak for a few minutes to stay open to the possibility that someone will want to talk to me and usually they do!  I hear incredible and fascinating stories about people’s experiences, hardships or how counseling helped them turn their lives around.  It’s really an incredible part of my job!

What can you do this week to be open to possibilities and plan for opportunities?  For example, sometimes I see clients who describe themselves as something like a “guitarist” or “writer” and when I asked them what music they play or what they write I am sometimes told they haven’t done it yet…what?!?  For example, if you want to be a guitarist, be open to playing the guitar, don’t worry about being the best!  Plan for the opportunity that when you have time to play this week  you will start playing!

Think of what else is possible in your week whether it’s being in the right place to catch your boss and ask for time off or speak to that cute person at the coffee shop.  Fear will not take you where you want to go, give yourself the best chance to make things happen!

“It’s not the amount of time you devote, but what you devote to the time that counts”-Anonymous #priorities #goals #selfcare #sayno #boundaries #should #want #mentalhealth #anxiety #energy

Posted by on Mar 11, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

Where does our time go?  Most of us feel like we have no time, however it’s interesting when you monitor your time and see where it goes…especially if your phone is telling you that 3 hours a day is spent on social media…it can be a shock.  Like the quote says, it’s “what” you devote the time to that counts, so how do you make it count?

A good way is to first think about where your time goes when you are not at school/work or someplace you need to be.  Are you doing things you “want to do” or feel you “should do?”  Are you parked in front of the TV when your real goal is to get 5,000 steps a day? Start questioning where your time and energy is going.  What am I doing now? Will this help me reach my goals? if not, you know what you need to do!

The reality is that there are many things in your control, you only have to choose what you want!  Of course this may not be easy at times…saying no and setting boundaries is hard, especially when they involve people.  However, when you are spending your time focused on something that brings you joy or helps you reach your goals, I think the guilt will fade and you will start choosing you more.  Positive results and feeling good with your decisions is right around the corner.  Go for it!

Confront the dark parts of yourself and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing-August Wilson #forgiveness #mentalhealth #anxiety #depression

Posted by on Mar 4, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

We can be our own worst enemies.  Our minds can sometimes beat us up with with ideas of perfection, traumatic memories and ideas of worthlessness, but not this week inner demons! This week we are going to forgive ourselves for that harsh inner self-talk and focus instead on reminding ourselves that we are doing some things right and are capable of doing so much more!

The blogspiration challenge this week is to say 1 nice thing to yourself each day…start right now!  It can be as simple as “I am awesome because I got all the kids to school on time!” or “I am rockin’ this dress today!” or “Woohoo, I did great at the gym for having to restart!”  The more kind you are to your inner self, the more you may actually start to believe it.  I believe in you!

“…life is neither a problem to be solved more a game to be won”-Timothy Ferris @tferriss #life #mentalhealth #mindfulness #happiness #stress #anxiety #depression #enjoylife #perspective

Posted by on Feb 25, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

As a society, people tend to be competitive.  Corporations are made up of “teams,” open work environments allow us to compare to our counterparts, reality competitions and sports are American past times.  Dramas and most movies are centered around some problem that needs to solved and most commercials are selling you a problem you didn’t know you had!

Constant comparison to others and attempting to “win” life is missing the point of living.  Marketing tells us we want to be like this person or have all these things, but competing and consumption often still leave people depressed, anxious and craving more. This week, notice when you are stuck on a problem or creating a competition in your head.  What would it be like not to have to solve a problem or compete with someone else? Change your perspective to start seeing life as something to enjoy with what you have and try to not be swayed otherwise by the messages around you (that’s the real competition!).

“I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.” -Stephen Covey @StephenRCovey #decisions #mentalhealth #circumstances #control #values #anxiety #depression #selfcare #blame #accountability

Posted by on Feb 18, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

We all know someone who tends to victimize themselves instead of taking any responsibility for their choices.  For example, someone who blames a roommate for not being able to finish their studying due to loud music when they didn’t ask for the music to be turned down or neglected to leave for a quieter setting.  Or maybe it’s blaming the weather for not being able to go for a run when there is a dusty treadmill in the basement.  Some blame others, some blame circumstances, some blame themselves.

This week, notice when you are blaming others or circumstances.  Then, ask yourself what was really in your control.  Sure you can blame late time at work for spending money at a restaurant after, however when we think it through: in the time spent driving and waiting at the restaurant, there probably was plenty of time to cook dinner and save money!

Think about how your decisions affect your values as well.  If you don’t want to go to happy hour because you value your family time, make the decision not to go this week and see how you feel differently.  Take control where you can through your decisions and don’t let those circumstances get in your way!

“He wondered if he had bitten off more than he could chew. Then he laughed, realizing that he had nothing to chew on at the moment”-Spencer Johnson #anxiety #mindfulness #selfcare #selftalk #failure #worry #thoughts #motivation #positivity

Posted by on Feb 11, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, especially if your life feels frenzied and chaotic in the midst of working, taking care of yourself and others that depend on you.  It’s easy to be programmed when life is most chaotic to feel impending anxiety coming from all angles..always giving us more to worry about.  Sometimes we even worry about things that didn’t happen…sure they may happen, but they still didn’t.  That’s what this quote is about…on the extreme level, I call this “catastrophizing.”

Catastrophizing is when we’ve created a scenario in our minds like it already happened.  For example, in your self-talk you may say things like “I’ve failed the test!,” “I’m going to get fired!,” “He’s not going to call me back!,” “I’m never going to get healthy!”

The challenge this week is to catch these thoughts, then gently remind yourself that they didn’t happen yet.  Ask yourself what 3 things you can do now to prevent them from happening.  Keep reassuring yourself along the way…anxiety loves the “what ifs” so watch out!  Chances are that things aren’t as bad as you’ve made them in your head.  Just think of all the time and energy you can save to focus on other positive things once these thoughts are gone…

“Everything is created twice-first mentally, then physically”-Greg Anderson #visualization #motivation #mentalfitness #performance #creativity #mindfulness #mindset

Posted by on Feb 4, 2019 in Blog | 0 comments

Studies from executives to athletes have proven that by visualizing something first, we are better able to perform our vision.  As we begin a new month of possibilities, what would you like to see happen this month?  What goals would you like to reach?  What would you like to do that brings you joy?

Take a moment and close your eyes.  Imagine yourself participating in one of these moments.

Next, do it again, but this time focus on the detail….what are you doing? how are you feeling? What are you wearing?, etc.

Keep doing this until you find yourself smiling at the thought and make a commitment to see this happen in reality.  The more you visualize it, the more you will gain confidence to make it happen.  It can be something small like cleaning your bathroom to crushing that presentation at work.  Dream it, take realistic steps and make it happen, February is your month to shine!